“Will the family and friends of my loved one be upset if there isn’t a traditional funeral held in a funeral home? … Is it okay to break tradition with something uplifting? … Will people think a celebration is inappropriate?” It is not uncommon for families to hesitate at the idea of funeral alternatives. Afterall, many people haven’t even heard of the term “celebration of life” until recently, let alone attended one. But you can also say there are many people who know they will cringe upon stepping into a funeral home. Lighten wants you to know that it is perfectly okay not to hold a traditional funeral service in a funeral home.
What are Funeral Alternatives?
Funeral alternatives can be summed up as life celebrations that take place outside of the traditional funeral home environment. These can be anything from Zoom memorials, celebration of life events, and cremation ceremonies. Besides the location, there are three other defining characteristics of funeral alternatives: tone, timing, and activities.
Uplifting Funeral Alternatives
Funerals are often somber affairs that carry overtones of sadness or grief. They are a time for mourning. Funeral alternatives, on the other hand, can turn mourning a death into celebrating a life. Typically, the overall tone of a memorial service or life celebration is uplifting. It is a time for the family and friends of your loved one to take joy in remembering how their life affected yours; share stories that will make people laugh and smile; take part in activities that honor your loved one in a way that is completely unique to them.
In fact, some families even believe that joy can be found within the memorial planning process for a memorial or life celebration, rather than somberly making the typical this-or-that choices presented during the traditional funeral planning process. Small details that are considered during the planning process for a memorial or life celebration, such as choosing a reading from your loved one’s favorite book rather than a sorrowful poem, can collectively create an uplifting process through which you fondly remember all of the delightful things about your loved one.
Timing of the Service
The immediate necessity to host a funeral can be overwhelming for some families. They typically fall within 5-7 days of passing, whereas funeral alternatives can be held at any time. And Lighten wants you to know that it is perfectly okay to hold a memorial service weeks, months, or even years after your loved one’s passing. It is never too late to hold a gathering to honor your loved one.
There are added benefits to the fact that funeral alternatives do not need to be held immediately following a passing. You can give yourself the time you need before stepping into the planning process, in order to give your attention to something that is deeply personal and truly meaningful. You also can take into consideration the time it takes to arrange childcare, caring for other family members, and other important commitments. Finally, you have the opportunity to plan the memorial to be held on a date of significance. A memorial can be made even more personal when it takes place on your loved one’s birthday, wedding anniversary, or other life milestone.
Funeral Alternatives Activities
Once you step outside the funeral home environment, opportunities open up to host any kind of event you think best honors your loved one. For example, you could host a dinner at home in which you and your family members come together to serve your loved one’s favorite foods. You could also organize a volunteer day for your friends and family to do good in honor of your loved one. Finally, you may consider gathering friends and family participation in planting a memorial garden.
Lighten is here to help you plan a celebration of life that is as unique as your loved one’s identity. If you are considering funeral alternatives, reach out to a Lighten team member to help you get started.
